标题:15QualitiesYouNeedtoDevelopMentalToughness source:inc丨byTRAVISBRADBERRY 欲翻译的小伙伴,可评论领稿,并把已完成的译文贴在评论处或发在自己的心理圈内。请领稿的小伙伴,尽量在一个星期内完成翻译,谢谢!! Weallreachcriticalpointsinourliveswhereourmentaltoughnessistested。Itmightbebecauseofatoxicfriendorcolleague,adeadendjob,orastrugglingrelationship。 Whateverthechallenge,youhavetobestrong,seethingsthroughanewlens,andtakedecisiveactionifyouwanttomovethroughitsuccessfully。 Itsoundseasy。Weallwantgoodfriends,goodjobs,andgoodrelationships。 Butitisnt。 Itshardtobementallytough,especiallywhenyoufeelstuck。Theabilitytobreakthemoldandtakeaboldnewdirectionrequiresthatextragrit,daring,andspunkthatonlythementallytoughestpeoplehave。 Itsfascinatinghowmentallytoughpeoplesetthemselvesapartfromthecrowd。Whereothersseeimpenetrablebarriers,theyseechallengestoovercome。 WhenThomasEdisonsfactoryburnedtothegroundin1914,destroyingoneofakindprototypesandcausing23millionindamage,Edisonsresponsewassimple:Thankgoodnessallourmistakeswereburnedup。Nowwecanstartfreshagain。 Edisonsreactionistheepitomeofmentaltoughnessseeingopportunityandtakingactionwhenthingslookbleak。 Therearehabitsyoucandeveloptoimproveyourmentaltoughness。Infact,thehallmarksofmentallytoughpeopleareactuallystrategiesthatyoucanbeginusingtoday。 1。Emotionalintelligence。 Emotionalintelligenceisthecornerstoneofmentaltoughness。Youcannotbementallytoughwithouttheabilitytofullyunderstandandtoleratestrongnegativeemotionsanddosomethingproductivewiththem。Momentsthattestyourmentaltoughnessareultimatelytestingyouremotionalintelligence(EQ)。 UnlikeyourIQ,whichisfixed,yourEQisaflexibleskillthatyoucanimprovewithunderstandingandeffort。Itsnowonderthat90percentoftopperformershavehighEQs,andthatpeoplewithhighEQsearn28,000moreannually(onaverage)thantheirlowEQcounterparts。 UnfortunatelyEQskillsareinshortsupply。TalentSmarthastestedmorethanamillionpeople,andwevefoundthatjust36percentoftheseareabletoaccuratelyidentifytheiremotionsastheyhappen。 2。Confidence。 Whetheryouthinkyoucan,orthinkyoucantyoureright。HenryFord MentallytoughpeoplesubscribetoFordsnotionthatyourmentalityhasapowerfuleffectonyourabilitytosucceed。Thisnotionisntjustamotivationaltoolitsafact。ArecentstudyattheUniversityofMelbourneshowedthatconfidentpeoplewentontoearnhigherwagesandgetpromotedmorequicklythanothersdid。 Trueconfidenceasopposedtothefalseconfidencepeopleprojecttomasktheirinsecuritieshasalookallitsown。Mentallytoughpeoplehaveanupperhandoverthedoubtfulandtheskittishbecausetheirconfidenceinspiresothersandhelpsthemtomakethingshappen。 3。Theabilitytoneutralizetoxicpeople。 Dealingwithdifficultpeopleisfrustratingandexhaustingformost。Mentallytoughpeoplecontroltheirinteractionswithtoxicpeoplebykeepingtheirfeelingsincheck。Whentheyneedtoconfrontatoxicperson,theyapproachthesituationrationally。Theyidentifytheiremotionsanddontallowangerorfrustrationtofuelthechaos。Theyalsoconsiderthedifficultpersonsstandpointandareabletofindcommongroundandsolutionstoproblems。Evenwhenthingscompletelyderail,mentallytoughpeopleareabletotakethetoxicpersonwithagrainofsalttoavoidlettinghimorherbringthemdown。 4。Knowinghowtoembracechange。 Mentallytoughpeopleareflexibleandareconstantlyadapting。Theyknowthatfearofchangeisparalyzingandamajorthreattotheirsuccessandhappiness。Theylookforchangethatislurkingjustaroundthecorner,andtheyformaplanofactionshouldthesechangesoccur。 Onlywhenyouembracechangecanyoufindthegoodinit。Youneedtohaveanopenmindandopenarmsifyouregoingtorecognize,andcapitalizeon,theopportunitiesthatchangecreates。 Youreboundtofailwhenyoukeepdoingthesamethingsyoualwayshaveinthehopethatignoringchangewillmakeitgoaway。Afterall,thedefinitionofinsanityisdoingthesamethingoverandoveragainandexpectingadifferentresult。 5。Sayingno。 ResearchconductedattheUniversityofCaliforniainSanFranciscoshowedthatthemoredifficultyyouhavesayingno,themorelikelyyouaretoexperiencestress,burnout,andevendepression。Mentallytoughpeopleknowthatsayingnoishealthy,andtheyhavetheselfesteemandforesighttomaketheirnoesclear。 Whenitstimetosayno,mentallytoughpeopleavoidphrasessuchasIdontthinkIcanorImnotcertain。Theysaynowithconfidencebecausetheyknowthatsayingnotoanewcommitmenthonorstheirexistingcommitmentsandgivesthemtheopportunitytosuccessfullyfulfillthem。 Thementallytoughalsoknowhowtoexertselfcontrolbysayingnotothemselves。Theydelaygratificationandavoidimpulsiveactionthatcausesharm。 6。KnowingthatfearistheNo。1sourceofregret。 Mentallytoughpeopleknowthat,whenallissaidanddone,theywilllamentthechancestheydidnttakefarmorethantheywilltheirfailures。Dontbeafraidtotakerisks。 Ioftenhearpeoplesay,Whatstheworstthingthatcanhappentoyou?Willitkillyou?Yet,deathisnttheworstthingthatcanhappentoyou。Theworstthingthatcanhappentoyouisallowingyourselftodieinsidewhileyourestillalive。 Ittakesrefinedselfawarenesstowalkthistightropebetweendwellingandremembering。Dwellingtoolongonyourmistakesmakesyouanxiousandgunshy,whileforgettingaboutthemcompletelymakesyouboundtorepeatthem。Thekeytobalanceliesinyourabilitytotransformfailuresintonuggetsofimprovement。Thiscreatesthetendencytogetrightbackupeverytimeyoufalldown。 7。Embracingfailure Mentallytoughpeopleembracefailurebecausetheyknowthattheroadtosuccessispavedwithit。Nooneeverexperiencedtruesuccesswithoutfirstembracingfailure。 Byrevealingwhenyoureonthewrongpath,yourmistakespavethewayforyoutosucceed。Thebiggestbreakthroughstypicallycomewhenyourefeelingthemostfrustratedandthemoststuck。Itsthisfrustrationthatforcesyoutothinkdifferently,tolookoutsidethebox,andtoseethesolutionthatyouvebeenmissing。 8。Withoutdwellingonmistakes。 Mentallytoughpeopleknowthatwhereyoufocusyourattentiondeterminesyouremotionalstate。Whenyoufixateontheproblemsthatyourefacing,youcreateandprolongnegativeemotionsandstress,whichhindersperformance。Whenyoufocusonactionstobetteryourselfandyourcircumstances,youcreateasenseofpersonalefficacy,whichproducespositiveemotionsandimprovesperformance。 Mentallytoughpeopledistancethemselvesfromtheirmistakes,buttheydosowithoutforgettingthem。Bykeepingtheirmistakesatasafedistance,yetstillhandyenoughtoreferto,theyareabletoadaptandadjustforfuturesuccess。 9。Refusingtoletanyonelimityourjoy Whenyoursenseofpleasureandsatisfactionisderivedfromcomparingyourselfwithothers,youarenolongerthemasterofyourownhappiness。Whenmentallytoughpeoplefeelgoodaboutsomethingtheydo,theywontletanyonesopinionsoraccomplishmentstakethatawayfromthem。 Whileitsimpossibletoturnoffyourreactionstowhatothersthinkofyou,youdonthavetocompareyourselfwithothers,andyoucanalwaystakepeoplesopinionswithagrainofsalt。Mentallytoughpeopleknowthatregardlessofwhatpeoplethinkofthematanyparticularmoment,onethingiscertaintheyreneverasgoodorbadaspeoplesaytheyare。 10。Andnotlimitingthejoyofothers。 Mentallytoughpeopledontpassjudgmentonothersbecausetheyknowthateveryonehassomethingtooffer,andtheydontneedtotakeotherpeopledownanotchtofeelgoodaboutthemselves。 Comparingyourselfwithotherpeopleislimiting。Jealousyandresentmentsucktheliferightoutofyou;theyremassiveenergystealers。Mentallytoughpeopledontwastetimeorenergysizingpeopleupandworryingaboutwhetherornottheymeasureup。 Insteadofwastingyourenergyonjealousy,funnelthatenergyintoappreciation。Whenyoucelebratethesuccessofotherpeople,youbothbenefit。 11。Exercising。 AstudyconductedattheEasternOntarioResearchInstitutefoundthatpeoplewhoexercisedtwiceaweekfor10weeksfeltmoresocially,intellectually,andathleticallycompetent。Theyalsoratedtheirbodyimageandselfesteemhigher。Bestofall,ratherthanthephysicalchangesintheirbodiesbeingresponsiblefortheuptickinconfidence,whichiskeytomentaltoughness,itwastheimmediate,endorphinfueledpositivityfromexercisethatmadeallthedifference。 12。Gettingenoughsleep。 Itsdifficulttooverstatetheimportanceofsleeptoincreasingyourmentaltoughness。Whenyousleep,yourbrainremovestoxicproteins,whicharebyproductsofneuralactivitywhenyoureawake。Unfortunately,yourbraincanremovethemadequatelyonlywhileyoureasleep,sowhenyoudontgetenoughsleep,thetoxicproteinsremaininyourbraincells,wreakinghavocbyimpairingyourabilitytothinksomethingnoamountofcaffeinecanfix。 Mentallytoughpeopleknowthattheirselfcontrol,focus,andmemoryareallreducedwhentheydontgetenoughortherightkindofsleep,sotheymakequalitysleepatoppriority。 13。Limitingcaffeineintake。 Drinkingexcessiveamountsofcaffeinetriggersthereleaseofadrenaline,thesourceofthefightorflightresponse。Thefightorflightmechanismsidestepsrationalthinkinginfavorofafasterresponsetoensuresurvival。Thisisgreatwhenabearischasingyoubutnotsogreatwhenlifethrowsyouacurve。 Whencaffeineputsyourbrainandbodyintothishyperarousedstateofstress,youremotionsoverrunyourbehavior。Caffeineslonghalflifeensuresyoustaythiswayasittakesitssweettimeworkingitswayoutofyourbody。Mentallytoughpeopleknowthattoomuchcaffeineistrouble,andtheydontletitgetthebetterofthem。 14。Notwaitingforanapologytoforgive。 Mentallytoughpeopleknowthatlifegoesalotsmootheronceyouletgoofgrudgesandforgiveeventhosewhoneversaytheyresorry。Grudgesletnegativeeventsfromyourpastruintodayshappiness。Hateandangerareemotionalparasitesthatdestroyyourjoyinlife。 Thenegativeemotionsthatcomewithholdingontoagrudgecreateastressresponseinyourbody,andholdingontostresscanhavedevastatingconsequences(bothphysicallyandmentally)。Whenyouforgivesomeone,itdoesntcondonetheiractions;itsimplyfreesyoufrombeingtheireternalvictim。 15。Beingrelentlesslypositive。 Keepyoureyesonthenewsforanylengthoftime,andyoullseethatitsjustoneendlesscycleofwar,violentattacks,fragileeconomies,failingcompanies,andenvironmentaldisasters。Itseasytothinktheworldisheadeddownhillfast。 Andwhoknows?Maybeitis。Butmentallytoughpeopledontworryaboutthatbecausetheydontgetcaughtupinthingstheycantcontrol。Insteadoftryingtostartarevolutionovernight,theyfocustheirenergyondirectingthetwothingsthatarecompletelywithintheirpowertheirattentionandtheireffort。 Bringingitalltogether。 Mentaltoughnessisnotaninnatequalitybestoweduponaselectfew。Itcanbeachievedandenjoyed。 Whatelsemakespeoplementallytough?Howmanyofthese15qualitiesdescribeyou?PleaseshareyourthoughtsinthecommentssectionbelowasIlearnjustasmuchfromyouasyoudofromme。